there’s not a way to make this beautiful day get better
the numbers that i picked did the trick i’m the lucky one
a hundred million dollar check’s gonna come in the next week’s letter
with the lottery my problems now are done

so glad to hear about your fortune
what exactly was your portion
i’m there to help advise you when you buy suits, cars, and jets

i couldn’t think of a thing that i want
i’ve already got way too much
i’ll take the world out to a fine restaurant
and do nice things and such
you could buy me that dress, and then my friends
they could all be impressed, so in the end
don’t you give it away to everyone
we can use it to play, it will be fun

funny now to think on the brink of my big donation
all the sudden you’re my friend to the end and you need my aid
if i give it to the world, then my girl, you show aggravation
but your smile keeps shining, long as you get paid

this guy thinks he’ll donate the money
that’s great but it’s kinda funny
this will, once signed i’ll poison (kill) him, but not ‘til he signs

i’ve written out a plan to help you give your fellow man
the cash you got but there’s a lot of pages
so just sign it here
so much to think about i brought an icy drink around and now
you sign the dotted line
you see it’s all so very clear

sadly, we’ll see our dear friend leave us
gladly, though this won’t bereave us
fortunes can buy much more than solace and console us yet

i couldn’t think of a thing that i want
i’ve already got way too much
i’ll take the world out to a fine restaurant
and do nice things and such
gonna buy me that dress, and then my friends
they will all be impressed, so in the end
i won’t give it away to anyone
i can use it to play, it will be fun

when comes the time that she sees on the line my forgery
signing benedict arnold sure made her trick corrupt
some things that she said made it seem she was so dead morally

oh i might have accidentally switched our cups
yeah, i’m pretty sure i think i switched our cups
yeah, without a doubt i’m certain; mixed ‘em up